I will remember you, will you remember me?

Here's to the nights we felt alive,
Here's to the tears you knew you'd cry,
Here's to goodbye

Wow. What a challenging day. Today was the day my foreign brother Juan left for españa. I keep replaying the goodbye in my head, and I wish it never had happened. I wish I could make sense of where this year has gone to. How it felt so short. How to make the hurt stop. How to say goodbye and not feel sad.
Juan was like the brother I never had. That may sound bad, but it's true. I have a brother, but we don't really get along that great. Juan filled that void for me, so I think that's why goodbye was so difficult. I hope to visit next year, and it sounds like it could happen. But for now, here I am. I know, absolutely know, that I will see him again. He wants to visit, I want to visit. Hell, I wanna spend a semester or year in Spain, so I'm sure I'll see him again.
I know he's probably busy, but I wish he would've sent me a message when he was in an airport.
What a terribly difficult day... Thank god for friends. Hannah helped me sooooo much today.
I hope the tears are done.